Good News (for once).

I have finagled summer employment teaching, with a way-higher stipend and perqs than I deserve.

What a relief.

Okay, now on to the kvetchy stuff:

I have a deadline I am afraid I won't make. I'm working on it. Bleurgh.

I also apparently shocked the hell out of This Guy when I didn't stay quiet and let him do what I have come to call 're-lecturing' me. As in he presents a point, I offer a solution, he rejects this solution because it requires . I say okay, because I am not in the horse business, whether it is leading them to water *or* trying to make them drink. He senses then that I know his objections are total crap, so he revisits how distressed he is over the situation, and how I Just Don't Understand, and this lament takes longer than the initial exchange. I have already given up, so I am writing, grading, filing my nails, or something else. He takes this silence as concession, and finally works it out of his system.

Well, tonight I just got tired of this same schtick over and over, and said that I am not going to discuss it further. That we had 'agreed to disagree' (his words), so drop it. This shocked the hell out of him. Then he tried to change the subject and ask if I'd heard about this Summer position, and I told him I had gotten it. Then he got upset 'cos I had not told him before; I reminded him that he had monopolised the conversation with his diatribe (the one with no resolution, per him). Then I talked for a few minutes more and closed the call.

The bottom line is, I am tired of this. Anyone who knows me knows that my silence doesn't imply consent, it implies that I think the person is too neurotic, cowardly, stupid, incompetent, or simply unwilling to accept the input of others and take action. I do not communicate like a girl; I communicate more like a man in that I offer solutions to problems. What I am realising in my senescence is that people -- most people -- don't WANT a solution. They just want to vent or play victim; *I* am the one running my ass off to fix their broken messes to show them how to fix it. It has taken me years to get here, but I no longer do things like jump in with my Batman cape on when a coworker tells me that her car was towed because she didn't notice the County sticker on it because she doesn't drive it often, and now she doesn't have the money to bail her car out.

No, seriously. The Old Me would 'lend' (give) her the money, or phone the towing company (I have amazing negotiation skills) and work something out, or...something. I have learnt to instead say,'man...that sucks'.

I made the huge mistake of jumping in once last year with TG, and have vowed never again. Trust me: people find their way out of messes, and it makes them stronger. I just have to learn to keep my mouth shut and stop offering advice.

Boy, there are going to be some quiet-assed conversations ahead. Glad silence has never made me uncomfortable.


- Posted using SomeBlogApp that I don't know how to use. o_O