Look! More Kittens!

This has been a busy week, and I am in pretty constant pain, so I am just going to stop kvetching about that. Everyone else is fine; Romeo is fine, Harry still has his job, and Meg is in a generally pissy mood for some reason, but other than that, she is fine. Mummers is still batshit, however.

Oh, and my brother just had a birfday. Happy birfday, you stuffy bastard.

Butsoanyway.

I have given the task of feeding the Eviljob cats to Harry and Chrissy for the time being; I need a week to a month off to catch up with work and school, and to get used to being in pain all the god damned time.

Was is Camus who said that after a while, one could get used to anything? I sure hope that son of a bitch knows what he is talking about.

Sigh.

So I am putting trapping on hold, at least any that I might have been personally doing, or personally involved in. Anyone who wants to trap on their own at Eviljob has my best wishes. But on Monday evening, I got a call from someone in Security who knows someone who is working Security at this car auction place, and this guard has made friends with a feral cat there that has a litter...and it is the only feral cat on the entire property, which is at least the size of a football field, maybe two; they are the Ancodia Region centre for national and international auto auctions of cars that have been totalled-out by insurance companies, and they have a total turnover of stock -- the entire god-damned football field's worth -- every sixty to ninety days. Who in the fuck is buying all these smooshed cars????

And this guard wants me to find a momcat in this mess. 'Cos no one else will help.

Bwaah.

Fine. So I had a bout of retardation yesterday and forgot that it was Tuesday, and so I skipped a pretty important meeting, but feh. Whatever.

I get down to this place after getting lost at least twelve times in the ginormous industrial park it is in -- you know, the type that are always polluting the crap out of your Sim City? I always get lost in those, 'cos once you see one of those water tower thingies with the conveyor belts running up to it, and the cool-ass piles of rocks beneath, it's all one can do to keep driving and not think about climbing up one and having a cool-ass fist fight, or a shoot out.

So I got there, and the place is HUGE, and we have to take a golf cart halfway across all these lines of smashed cars...it looked like the parking lot at the Superbowl after Godzilla stepped on all the cars, ok? Really cool and freaky-looking, and part of the back lot used to be a car dealership, I think, 'cos a dead car dealership-looking building was still standing there, needing a good paint job way out in the back half of this place. It even had a service garage attached, and everything, though the back entrance from the road (what I am assuming was the back entrance) had been reclaimed by foliage, and now this tall-assed concrete and electric fence (concrete on the outside, electrified on the inside) separated the auto auction lot from the interstate on one end. This guard promised me that I could go check out the old dealership building if we got the cats with enough light left.

Heh. Yeah.

It took over an hour to find the mom cat. The Guard had named her Sweetie, and she was a light-coloured tortoiseshell. This cat, once she came around, walked right up to me and wiped her dirty fur all over my pants, and when I knelt down to pet her, she purred and *kissed* me. Then went over to rub all over the guard. Feral cat my *ass*...this was totally a PET. Though how in the crap she got over the fence, no one knew. The fence is (1) too high to jump, and (2) electrified on the inside, and there is a gap between the concrete wall and the electrified fence that is intentionally made so that even if one *did* make it to the top of the concrete fence, one could not jump over without touching the electrified fence, at which time one would get one's ass zapped. I am half-convinced that she might have been a passenger in one of the wrecked cars, or something. Maybe she was in an accident and got dazed, or was too stunned or scared to run, and she got towed away, hiding in her car? I guess we will never know.

Butsoanyway.

Sweetie had taken the guard to meet her three babies, and so the guard brought me over to where that was...no babies. I decided to sit still and see if they came out, and the guard went to look in nearby cars. After a while, I heard a whistle, and went to look; the guard had found them in a big pick-up truck, like an F150, or 250, whichever, or something. I could see one tiny nose sticking out from under the back bench seat. So I opened the back door, and I got hissed and spat at by a tiny kitten.

To make a VERY long story short, the sun was thinking about setting by then, all the employees had left, and as I wondered what I was going to do if I had to spend the night out here 'cos we'd been locked in, I was trying to lure the kittens out with tuna in a cat carrier. Sweetie was helping me. Then the lot manager (who has a fucking BEAUTIFUL Saleen like you would not believe parked up front...the guard had to walk me away from it before I put my dirty paws all over it) came out to find out why one of his carts was missing 'cos he personally closes up every night. Not that I blame him; if my business kept me in fucking beautiful Saleens, I'd be herding everyone out and locking up my damn self, too.

I thought he was going to be a dick, but he was really, REALLY nice when he found out what we were doing! He said he just wanted the cats out of there, and if I would catch them and take them away, he'd help any way he could. So he opened up the other side of the pick up, and showed me how the back bench seat lifted up...and there were FIVE kittens there! All crouched together. Mr Manager grabbed the tiniest one and handed it to me, saying 'Runt goes first!' :-) I put the runt in the carrier (a big one!) and then scooped up two more and stuck them in, then two more. Then we tried to get one that we saw run under the front seat (that's SIX, mind you), and it darted up into the dashboard on the passenger side. I was afraid that if it got out, I would NEVER find it in this huge lot, and it would get smooshed by a tow truck or fork lift, or shipped off to Pakistan (why are people in Pakistan buying wrecked cars?), or something. Mr Manager took the a/c assembly out in like two *seconds*, and assured me that the kittens could not get out, but the guard went and stood by the front, just in case. We pulled the glove box down, and tried to reach up the vent, but no luck. Then the Manager saw a kitten face behind the a/c big box that is behind the glove box, and he tried to reach it, but he got bitten. So he took this thing that looked like a spatula (all the cars had personal stuff still inside...the pick up truck still had some kind of folding baby carriage in the back) off the floor and tried to poke it out, but it just hunched down and refused to budge.

BWAAH!

We were out of stuff to disassemble on the dash, and Mr Manager suggested that I put Sweetie in the cabin and close the doors to see if they would see Mom and come out. I was not crazy about the idea, but Sweetie was pretty docile, and I did not have any better ideas, so I did it, and held the door closed.

If Sweetie had been feral I would have never tried that, though.

We waited about ten minutes, and then I thought I saw something stirring under the hanging glove box; I opened the door and grabbed Sweetie and the kitten, and as I turned to dump them in the carrier, I saw ANOTHER grey kitten that had come out of the dash!

Ok, that is SEVEN. As in four more than the three I went there to get.

Mr Managerman let me do a once-over to make sure that was all of them, and I really believe that it was. I think they had all been asleep in the back underneath the seat, and the one I saw skedaddling up into the dash was actually two. The guard said he would check over the next few days to see if he saw any signs of kittens that got left, and since the Manager had to go and wanted the day guard and myself to leave, that was ok with me. I really *really* believe that seven was it, though; Sweetie is only about a year old, I would guess, and she is not a big cat.

Butsoanyway; here are the only pictures I was able to take, 'cos I was told that I am completely NOT allowed to take pictures in there, so I had to sneak and take them on my cell phone:

This white truck was Home.
Sorry for the crappy view, but I had to sneak this one.

Sweetie & Co., immediately after being cotched. :-)

After everyone had calmed down a bit.

God is a good driver? Ummm...maybe not so much.
Just god damned funny -- you might not be able to see it in the pic, but the bumper sticker says, 'GOD is STEERING...I'm only in the Driver's Seat'
I damn near wet myself.

And the Manager said that I had to leave with him and the guard, and was not allowed to be walking around the property anyway (the guard asked for me, but Mr Manager explained to me that half his employees are not allowed back in the lot for security and insurance reasons, and *I* was totally NOT allowed to be back there, so once cat-catching was done, I had to vacate ASAP), so I missed out on checking out the dead dealership building. Sigh. No justice...I swear. And if the Manager had not been with us, I think the night security guards would have fricking strip-searched me, or something. I was getting *glared* at. Sheesh. Back off...I'm packing kittens!

But at least we stopped a feral colony before it started. Yay.

I called in my very lastliest favour with this rescue group, and got to bring Sweetie and Company over to the home of one of their past presidents (thank GOD!). She is going to give Sweetie a chance to eat (she is hungry as HELL) and calm down, and then take her to the vet on Friday or Monday to see if she is microchipped. If not, she'll get an FIV/FeLV test, and if that is negative, she'll stay at this lady's house until she stops nursing and her babies are old enough to be speutered, then they will all go to get adopted. Now I have to come up with something really nice to do to have more favours...as run-down as I am, that may be crapping out and just buying a bunch of traps and donating them, or something. Sigh. But at least Sweetie and her babies are safe. I hope she is microchipped, and could maybe go back home; she is a nice cat, and a good mom.

.

Sleeping for once.

I honestly have done little other than sleep all weekend, save for having to go to work Saturday and do stuff like shopping today (a really short food run, and stopping to feed the Eviljob cats).  I was up for a bit, but now I am going *back* to sleep.  I almost have a headache, but it is like a thirty-second one that goes and comes back every once in a while. 

But other than that, I am ok, and all the cats are ok. 

Yay.

.

Holy Crap...

I left work early to go home and lie down, so i am watching The
Wedding Date, and it struck me that i am not unlike Kat. Like a lot.
And just now in the movie, Kat's mom just took the microphone, and i
realised from her speech that she is amazingly like Mummers...god, i
hope this movie ends well. :-)

Owch.

Biopsy results in about a week. I hurt like hell. Nabothian cyst on my
cervix to be removed on the 7th. 4cm cyst on Millicent. I am back on
The Pill to see if that will bring the cyst on Millicent down, cos
otherwise he wants to cut Millicent out. I did not want to be alone
after (it hurt so badly, i cannot even describe it, like being stabbed
in the womb, or something. Guys, that would be like taking a knife in
the nuts, ok?), so my pained and bleeding self phoned Meg repeatedly
until she gave up on having office hours and came to be with me. We
had lunch as i waited for all the painkillers i took to kick in, and
then i made her go with me to get a pedicure. The place i love to go
to is a Vietnamese place, and they have guys who work there too--they
own the place. And they have two wide-screen tvs on each end of the
room, and they always fight about what gets on tv. It's funny. Today
one of the guys went to the video rental place nearby and got a bunch
of kick boxing movies, so Meg and i watched some Stephen Segal movie
where a lot of things were blown up, then we watched some other
kick-boxing movie called Feets of Stank, or something. They are cool,
but i can never follow the plots, and painkillers don't help. But it
is better than being alone. Ow.

I am eager for this week to be over...

Biopsy tomorrow... I just want to sleep for a week. Work, both of
them, has been so busy that it is unreal. Harry picked up his car on
Monday. Or, girl-friend of Harry did, cos Harry is still working at
this new job...thank god. I guess that i need to go to sleep.

Reality TV update...

I completely forgot to kvetch about how stupid it was to let Tabatha
off Shear Genius; it should have been Tyson and that other guy -- not
Boogie. They totally should have split the teams for elimination. What
bullshit. Tabatha was great! She totally out-classed what'shisface
that stayed on. Not Boogie. And i am *so* desperately hoping
Saaphyri wins on FoL Girls: Charm School! I just LOVE her! I swear to
god, i am justthisclose to offering to adopt her ass or something; she
is just so damn cute!
I keep forgetting to check to see if there are any rumours about who
wins either show, though if i had read that Tabatha got eliminated, i
probably would have discounted it as nonsense.

Sunday is Ultrasound Day...

I am going for my pre-biopsy ultrasound. I guess Sunday ultrasounds
is one benefit of large cities, cos i sure didn't know how i was going
to fit this in this coming week. Meg is playing in her tournament
today. Sigh. I would rather be there. Pfft.

The last thing I need is horny robots running around in here...

I am feeling much better. No, rilly. I am. I will hang in there until Thursday just fine, I think. Actually, after Thursday, but whatever. I am trying to work and watching The Devil's Rejects as I am waiting for some other movie to come on that I wanted to see but cannot remember the name of right now. Oh, yeah -- Grandma's Boy. I need puerile humour. :-)

The Devil's Rejects is one dumb-assed fucking movie, but there are some great lines in it.

Butsoanyway.

I guess that I do not have a whole lot to say right now...my mind is busy. Or I am stupid. :-) Or both.

So I will just do a meme, instead...

1. The phone rings; who do you want it to be?

God, telling me that I am a multi-quadrillionaire, leader of the Free World but can run it as a virtual position, ‘cos have the next four years off for vacation, after which I can have his position, because he’s sick of all the big, hairy bullshit.

2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart?

Not only do I return my cart, if I see a stray I will go get it and take that one in to use. Having my car bumped by stray carts annoys the crap out of me.

3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener?

It completely depends upon the situation; if I get the feeling that the person with whom I am speaking would rather talk (or needs to), I am more of a listener. This is usually what happens.

4. Do you take compliments well?

No; I hate compliments. They make me feel…I don’t know; self-conscious and icky.

5. Do you play Sudoku?

Like with whose time?

6. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive?

Certainly. And then I would hunt down whoever had abandoned me there, and kill them. Slowly.

7. Do you like to ride horses?

It is ok, but it was never a huge interest of mine (I never caught ‘horse fever’ like most girls seem to), and I have not had the time to in years.

8. Did you ever go to camp as a kid?

Blecch. Yes. Several times, and I hated it, because it always seemed as if everyone in charge (counsellors, director, etc…) went out of their way to make everyone uncomfortable – for example, one year the bathroom for our group was out of commission, and instead of fixing it, ‘fessing up to the parents, or closing down the one group area, our lucky group had to hike through the woods to another group’s facilities, be it day, night, raining…whatever. Hated. That went on for two weeks until one kid in our group told her parents (most of us I guess figured our parents knew, or something), then all hell broke loose and they re-grouped us. And the food usually sucked. And I hate having every freaking minute of the day scheduled. So ummm…yes. I did go. :-)

9. What was your favorite game as a kid?

Oh, lord… As far as kid/kid games, we were constantly changing games; there was no one game that we played all the time. If I had to pick between team and group games, then? Ahhh…I don’t know. I liked all the pretend games, even if we had to play War, too. Sigh. As far as board games, I guess Ghosts or Which Witch (shocker; I was a spooky child, also). As far as video games, how far back in kid-hood are we talking, here? *Way* too many to pick from.

10. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was married, would you go for it?

No. If they’ll do it with you, they’ll do it *to* you. For real – that is someone’s dreamboat that is in the process of shipwrecking; why in the fuck would I want to climb on that? Plus, knowing they were like that would make them decidedly un-sexy.

11. Have you lied to get out of a date?

Auk! Yes. I am a terrible person, I know. Everything from getting my cell to ring to saying I had choir rehearsal…which, as an agnostic, is a little hard to get away with.

12. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you?

I guess it would depend upon (1) how cuckoo *their* beliefs were, and (2) how tolerant of others (myself included) they were. I am not changing for ANYONE. I do not have any religious beliefs, just a few spiritual ones, so I will get along with anyone, provided they are not a total extremist freak.

13. Do you like to pursue or be pursued?

That would depend on the situation, as well as my level of interest. If I am pursuing a total unknown and do not have positive feedback, then I assume they are Otherwise Occupied and lose interest. If I have a high level of interest, then being pursued is fine; if my interest is low, then that’s just one more crazy stalker nut. Sigh. I am too difficult, I know.

15. Do any songs make you cry?

Yes. It is because I am pathetic. What songs? If I am in one of those moods, it could be anything. The freaking Star Spangled Banner would work.

16. Are you continuing your education?

Bwaah…yes. To the bitter end.

17. Do you know how to shoot a gun?

Yes.

18. If your house was on fire, what would be the first thing you grabbed?

My felines! :-D I would be running out of the house nude, cramming cats into my big carrier…all five of them.

19. How often do you read books?

Constantly, it seems. For leisure, not so much these days, though I did start one today and think I can finish it by tomorrow.

20. Do you think more about the past, present or future?

All three. Often at once. Yes, I take Imitrex.

21. What is your favorite children's book?

I loved a bunch of books, from Dr Seuess to Golden Books. The Monster at the End of This Book was a favourite, but the first one that I read over and over and loved was The Mystery of the Chinatown Pearls; I begged my mom to buy it for me at a library clearance sale (she was sure I did not really want it because she said that it was too old for me), and then begged her to let me get my hair in a French Twist for months after.

22. What color are your eyes?

Pond-scum green.

23. How tall are you?

5’ 10”

24. Where is your dream house located?

I would be happy with a place in Hawaii, or the mountains. Or some cute tiny little town near a city large enough that I would be occupied when I wanted to be. I am not picky.

Well, maybe a little picky. :-) It is not about where in a physical sense for me as much as with respect to…I guess more a ‘where’ mentally, and in terms of lifestyle. And the people I am with. If that part is good, then where I am physically is a trivial issue.

Though somewhere that has a place where a girl can hang out in autumn, walk around some water, see some gorgeous foliage, and go window-shopping in a cute little downtown area would definitely be nice.

Bonus points for having sparkly lights in the trees.

25. Do you have a secret fetish?

Sigh…yes. More than one, actually. Only a couple important ones, however. :-) I may need to start a list with a priority ranking…

26. Have you tried sushi?

Tried many times over; I love sushi. I intend to keep trying it. :-D

27. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth?

Yes. One of the biggest losses of my life was a strip of pictures taken with a friend who died not long afterwards; I lost it when my purse was stolen, because I kept it in my wallet. I have taken a few since then, but off the top of my head can only think of where one other would be; it is of me, my best friend at the time, and the Former Future Mr Ancodia. I should probably burn that eventually. I wish my former best friend were not in it, ‘cos that is the only reason I have hung on to it this long. She would probably still be my best friend if she had not become a psychotic drug addict, thief, and pathological liar. I liked her a lot.

28. When was the last time you were at Olive Garden?

For some weird reason, that is one of Meg’s favourite restaurants; I have to eat there probably every month or so. Last time was I think last Saturday afternoon with Meg and Baby Bat.

29. When was the last time you were at Church?

When my brother was married. Bwaah…no: I went to buy a Mass for a co-worker’s brother who died, and I think *that* was the last time. Though that might not count as being *in* church. Nor would my brother’s marriage then, I guess. Prior to that? Ummm…shit; I forget. I have been in more churches and temples than I can remember, and none totally stick out in my mind except for one really nice Christmas where the person I was dating took me to their church to go carolling. That was actually really wonderful, ‘cos most of the people we visited were older parishioners who really enjoyed it, and we got to visit with them for a while after before we moved on to the next home. That was probably one of the nicest Christmas Eves I have had.

30. Where was the furthest place you traveled today?

To Job 2, because I think you meant farthest. The furthest was probably that weird-ass dream I had this morning about taking Romeo to the Wonderland Mall (carried under my arm) to hear Wynonna sing. Don’t ask me where that one came from; neither Romeo nor I particularly *like* Wynonna. But there were torches all over the place, and it was freaking Romeo out, but it looked pretty cool. I woke up before we got to see Wynonna.

Now I have to figure out where I will take Squooshable.

31. What was your favorite job?

Working in a beauty salon because I got to play with all the crap, although obviously I did not like it enough to stay there. I also liked teaching computers, though. And I did like the theatre stint I did. I do not know, really; this is a tough question for me. I have done a lot of things, and I liked most all of them on at least some level. I kind of like what I am doing now that best…mostly. I guess.

32. Do you like mustard?

Ummm…yes. I do. All different kinds, a lot, on the right foods. This has to be one of the weirdest questions I’ve been asked. Are you going to ask me if I like cheese next?

33. Do you prefer to sleep or eat?

I guess sleep, unless I was really hungry. Are you running out of questions?

34. Do you look like your mom or dad?

Neither one; more of a cross, I guess. I look like one of my aunts a lot, though. I have facial features from Mummers’ side of the family, but I ended up with a head full of paternally-inspired ‘cat fur hair’ (that’s what my hairdresser named it, and before she knew that I was a crazy cat lady). My colouring is more paternal…except for my eyes; I definitely have eyes from Mom’s side.

35. How long does it take you in the shower?

Ten minutes, minimum. If I had my druthers, I would be in there a fucking week, probably. I rarely get my druthers.

36. Can you do the splits?

Probably not any more; I haven’t tried in years.

37. What movie do you want to see right now?

Way, way, WAY too many. I will never get to see them all…sigh. Juste pour Rire is coming up…let’s go there instead! :-D

38. If you could fast forward your life, would you?

Only if I could rewind as well.

39. What did you do for New Year's?

I went out for the first time in a few years. I had not missed much during my hiatus. This year I think I will hide under my bed.

40. Do you think The Grudge was scary?

No. Yet one more Motif of Harmful Sensation movie, IMO. One of many. *Too* many. Zzzzzz…

…though I *do* want to get around to seeing Cigarette Burns.

41. Could you relate to a character in Mean Girls?

You *are* running out of questions, aren’t you?

42. Do you own a camera phone?

Yes. And I am sure the world is fascinated.

43. Do you have an "ex box" with pics and letters from past lovers?

Kind-of. I have stuff that I should throw away, I know that.

44. Was your mom a cheerleader?

ROFLOL! Oh-my-god, what an image! Ummm…no. Although she is athletically-inclined, Mummers would not like looking like the other girls, first off. Second, she would resent whomever was in charge (unless it was *her*). Third, if she were in charge, she would oversleep and miss every practice. Fourth, my mommy would castigate her team if they were losing, and think that she was being clever by making up derogatory cheers to spur them on. Fifthly, Mom would get bored halfway through any game and just leave. Cheerleader? HAH!

45. What's the last letter of your middle name?

N.

46. Do you like your middle name?

Actually, yes. Should I ever have a daughter, she might find herself saddled with it.

47. How many hours of sleep do you get a night?

What is this ‘sleep’ thing of which you speak?

48. Do you like care bears?

YES! I love the Care Bears! I think that, since they do not have a Goth Bear, that I am most like Grumpy Bear, except for the not being ‘too’ grumpy part…although I did take one quiz a while ago that said I was a Goth Care Bear; I pegged my Caring Meter on the rain-cloud side a long time ago, baby.

49. What do you buy at the movies?

Popcorn and a drink, usually. If it is a place that serves food, then I get regular food. Or nachos; nachos are cool. One of my absolute favourite theatres has a full restaurant and you sit at tables – they have awesome nachos.

50. Do you know how to play poker?

Oh, no. Not at all. Though I would love to learn! So if you wanted to teach me that would be great! But we should play for money, so that I have encouragement to learn, though. Ok? :-D

51. Do you wear your seatbelt?

Most always. My car dings at me when I don’t, and that is annoying.

52. What do you wear to sleep?

Usually nothing. Sometimes an oversized t-shirt, and I do have some actual nightgowns that I use when I travel or…whatever. And if I am cold, I will wear sweats.

53. Anything big ever happen in your hometown?

On the North American continent, my hometown is behind only like, NYC and maybe Toronto in ‘bigness’. In impact and attitude, if not size. What do you *want* to happen there? Let me assure you: It already has.

54. How many meals do you eat a day?

Usually one. Want to offer to make something for me? No? Then shut up.

55. Is your tongue pierced?

No, though I have been tempted a few times; I hear that they are loads of fun. I would never be able to, though. That would very much not fly in my current career(s), so I just have to make up for it in other ways. ;-)

56. Ever meet anyone you met on myspace?

No. Can’t say I am really feeling the Myspace Thing.

57. Do you read myspace bulletins?

No, though I am sure they are bulletining something important; I am certain it is my loss.

Ok, not really.

58. Do you like funny or serious people better?

Again, it depends; if everything is functioning normally, I like funny people. However I do not like it when humour is the *only* thing a person has going for them.

59. Ever been to L.A.?

Yes, but I took Cipro and washed with Comet afterwards, so I am okay now.

60. Did you eat a cookie today?

No. Want to come over and make cookies for me? No? Then shut up.

Sniffle…and I *wanted* a coookie! ;-)

61. Do you use cuss words in other languages?

Yes, occasionally. Humorously enough, the only cursing I could get away with in front of my parents (before I turned eighteen) was in Sacre. They knew what it meant – my father speaks French (and Quebec French), and my mother is passable for basic stuff in QF (though she has a god-awful accent in it at some points, like a piano with a few keys out of tune) – but I think they were not offended by it because neither is fervently religious; my father is an agnostic, and my mother is religious mostly on paper (when she is not immediately afraid she will die – then she becomes Quite Pious Indeed). If I went overboard around French speakers though, I stood to have the hell beaten out of me. ;-) In the past few years however, I have intentionally tried to cut back on non-Englishisms; I figure that if I am going to kvetch about people not assimilating, I need to assimilate my own ass.

62. Do you steal or pay for your music downloads?

Oh, don’t be ridiculous…of course I *always* pay for them. Puh-LEEZ!

63. Do you hate chocolate?

Why should I hate chocolate?

64. What do you and your parents fight about the most?

My mother and I? Everything. My father and I? These days, nothing.

65. Are you a gullible person?

Sadly, sometimes. Other times, I am over-guarded. Hard to find a good balance there.

66. Do you need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy?

No. I am far happier alone than with a shitty boy- or girl-friend. I am quite comfortable with waiting.

67. If you could have any job what would it be?

I would like to be god. That would be cool.

68. Are you easy to get along with?

Extremely, as long as you are.

69. What is your favorite time of day?

Probably afternoon and evening. Sometimes late at night, especially if I get to see sparkly lights. :-) I am a big sucker for sparkly lights.

Welcome to my breakdown; I hope I didn't scare you...

.


Ok...I have to make this quick, 'cos I simply must get some sleep; I am exhausted and in pain.

When I started bleeding, I tried to phone my marvellous gyn, and found out that he was closed. As in for months. My GP told me that he has cancer of the bile duct(s).

Ok, so I broke down over that one. I love my gyn.

Butsoanyway.

So I had to go hunting for a new gyn, and took many recommendations. Of those, I picked the one who would see me the soonest.

Ok, so here's the skinny:

My pain is partly due to cervical cysts/abscess things. That is ok. Since I have never had them before (as far as we know), this is probably easily fixable.

The other part of my pain and the whole of my bleeding however, Dr Gyn thinks may have another cause. I am having an ultrasound over the weekend, and a biopsy this coming Thursday. I really dread being overly-dramatic, and this is NOT a diagnosis, but Dr Gyn is looking at the possibility of endometrial cancer.

Oh, yay.


I did freak, I am nervous (I would be lying if I said that I was not), but I am not going to allow myself a full-blown freak-out until I get biopsy results. So don't panic.

DON'T PANIC: That is like, the best advice in the world. Ever. Bar none.

In Other News, Romeo is doing well and was upped to 150-whatevers of fluids 2x/wk from the 100 he was getting 'cos he is constipated. And I had to buy DSS for him...which turns out to be just plain ol' Colace. Well, the girl at the pharmacy did not know that, and Dr Vet was closed, so I had to phone my GP to ask him if he knew what DSS for constipation was. Thank god my GP keeps freaky hours and loves me...and animals. :-) So Rome is on Colace. 100mg per day, in case you ever need to get your cat of approximately ten lbs to poop and cannot get to the vet right away. It takes about 12 hours to work, and it helps if one wets the pill first to make it slimy.

And Meg is off to some tournament in New Orleans. Mom left for the weekend as well, so I am all alone. And lonely. Sigh. And drowning in work.

More later when I am not so tired and in so much pain. Promise. I have taken one Cataflam *and* 800mg of Ibuprofen, and I am still hurting. Time for Tramadol. Sigh.

P.S.: Yes, I gave Harry the money to get his god damned car back. Call me stupid.

.

No time like the present...

I will not get any more time than i have now any time soon. Sigh. Work
is hectic, as always. Both of them. Yesterday i had to race out of
work to keep Mummers from being arrested at her bank when a lady in
front of her in the drive-through said Mom hit her Lincoln with mom's
Mercedes. Mom told her to go to hell, and so this lady phoned the
police, and Mummers phoned me. Bwaah! When the police arrived, they
told the lady there was no damage, and this lady was going
psychoapeshit when i pulled up. The police just made them exchange
information, and that's when Mom found out Crazy Woman was one year
younger than her (i spend a lot of time around crazy old ladies), at
which point (still all blocking the drive-through, cos Lincoln Lady
refused to move until the police got there, and was still refusing to
move until the police took pictures of the 'crime scene'...a direct
quote), Mummers told her to mind her elders, and Lincoln Lady tried to
take a swing at Mom. Then they both started swearing at each other,
and the police threatened to arrest them both, and tried to gently
guide them apart, but Mom started making some gestures at LL, and LL
went psychoapeshit again. I did not see the gestures, but Mom's cop
started laughing, and i *did* see Mom stick out her tongue, make a
'nyah!' face, and waggle her hips. I got between Mom and LL, and
started yelling at Mom that i could not believe she did that, and i
couldn't see LL's officer, but i thought the officer blocking Mom was
about to wet himself. Finally they made LL drive away first, and then
told Mom to leave. Both of them were told to not contact each other,
to go through their insurance companies. Sigh. Mom said she
appreciated having me on her side. Just shoot me. In Other News, i
started bleeding over the weekend, and am going to the gyn tomorrow. I
an running out of room here and have to go, so more later...soon.
Swear.

I am still alive...

I am just having a horrid week. Everyone else is fine though, so I guess that is good.

I am much better today.

But still tired. I am meeting Harry for trivia tonight, and i know i
should sleep, but i want the respite from work too much. When i get
out of here, i am going to take a nap, though. I got Romeo to eat
almost half of a small can of Wellness' Lobster and Chicken, so that
is good, even though i am still having to give him the cyproheptadine
(or whatever) to get him to eat. His fur feels dirty, but his staples
are not out yet, so i do not think that i should bathe him, and i also
do not want him to get cold, so i do not want to use the wipes.
Anyway...things are ok.

What's the world record for misery?

Sigh.  I am STILL typing, and I am SO FUCKING TIRED THAT I COULD JUST DIE. 

Mummers had a colonoscopy this morning, and is currently sleeping in my spare bedroom.

I could not be there because I had to be at work.

I am worried that They are going to find that she is anaemic from intestinal bleeding.

The second half of her colonoscopy is on Wednesday. 

Hard to believe They would have that much faith that someone would go back for Round Two.  That is almost delusionally optimistic, in my opinion. 

When Mom woke up, she told Meg that she wanted a root beer float, and that I had promised her one.

I did not, and have no idea where that came from.

Sometimes the things Mummers comes up with when she is all doped-up after things like this (stents, etc...) make me cry.

I am going to get a root beer float for her just as soon as I can.

Romeo seems ok, but he barfed today and he seems constipated.  I decided to not dose him with Baytril tonight, but I may change my mind on that. 

I am having the worst bout of pelvic pain I have had in like, four years. 

I know that you really wanted to know that.

If it makes you feel better, it is stress from everything; every muscle in my body will go from  0 - concrete in 0.0017 seconds with enough stress.

But it hurts enough that I am crying.

I would take something for the pain, but if the pain goes away, I might well fall asleep.

Can't do that.

Breakfast is almost definitely pregnant.

I have decided within the course of a week that I think (how's that for decision?) that I do NOT like Job 2 any longer.  I have been working from home and avoiding it since Friday. 

Thursday, actually.

As much as a sideways glance from anyone, and I will damn well walk out tomorrow.

I hate hurting like this.  It makes the headache I have seem like nothing, and it also makes me feel like...I don't know.  Worthless, or something. 

No one cares, not even me. 

Harry has a job now; he has had it for a week, and if he can keep it he might be okay financially; in the meantime, he needs $2,000 to get his car back.

And then he still has to make a May or June payment...I could not get a straight answer there, but it is one of the two.

After all the other money I have given him, plus Romeo's bills, I really do not have a spare $2,000 that I can pull out of my ass.  In one tiny week, Romeo has damn near obliterated anything remotely resembling 'pin money' that I had.  Plus some.  And if I dip into my Desperate Calamity money for Harry, eventually I will have none when a Desperate Calamity *does* hit. 

Which, the way my life is going, should happen around 11 May.

This is after my also refusing to pay the however-much in (alleged...this is a long story that I have not had the chance to blog about) back child support (for Muffin, who is over eighteen) so that he can get his licence reinstated on Good Faith that once he got it reinstated he could get some effing court date to get this mistake cleared up.  I do believe it is a mistake, and it would not surprise me in the least to find that someone with Harry's first and last name or Soundex code just turned up on some Deadbeat Dad list, and there is a lazy lady processing suspension requests down at the DMV, or something equally stupid...

If you are thinking that it is hard to believe that there are two people in my city with the name Shit Head, you and I have a similar sense of humour.

However, I trust the government NOT IN THE SLIGHTEST.  They would never give me my money back, and we all know that.

I told Harry to get Glenn Sacks to put his money where his mouth is and lend it to Harry.

Harry managed to get his licence back, and court date or whatever without my money, because it is clearly a mistake.

Shocker.

If I go putting all this shit on credit cards, I will be drowning in debt in no time flat because once I say yes to one thing, what is one more thing?  And one more?  And one more?  And by then, it's so bad that why the fuck not? 

...you know?

I miss having spare time.  I miss it a lot. 

I am sorry to keep whining.  I really, really am.

I am not done yet. 

I have decided that I actually love my advisor, who took my side on something that was really, really important last week.  It was so nice that it made me cry.

But I cried in the bathroom in another college's building, and no one saw.  Or if anyone did see me after, they had no idea who I was.

I hate it when people see me cry.

A lot of things are making me cry anymore.

I am afraid that if I even try to nap, I will wake up and it will be noon. 

Have I won yet?

.

I want a vacation.

Ok...I am like, back officially drowning. Crap due tomorrow, and I am probably not going to be done. This is bad. Romeo is ok, Mummers has Jell-O for brains, Meg is back from Vegas, and Harry had his car repo'd. ...this is in spite of the fact that so far this year, I have given him three -- THREE -- months' worth of car payments.

What month is this again?

...think Harry might have been lying to me about how far behind he was?

Ummm...yeah. So it would seem.

BWAAH!

And then I just did my usual paranoid hit-check, and...

Guess who pops up (fifth down) when one asks Google if it is ok to snort Buspar?

Jesusgod, christ-on-a-cracker...

Just fucking shoot me.

.

I want hazard pay.

One of my first 'situations' today was wanting me to 'very fy'
something for them. Aside from 'very fying' the fact that they are
illiterate, that is.

Romeo seems to be doing mostly ok; i got an email yesterday from the
law firm with whom i registered. It said that some court will decide
on 31 May where jurisdiction lies, so i have at least a month's wait.
Double-sigh. Ok...major project this weekend after i am through with
this... Whee.

Drowning in work

I am fine, Romeo is fine, and his weight is up a bit, too.  As in closer to normal; he had lost a little over a pound, but hopefully he will regain it. 

I am about to have to start using this blog to kvetch about work and school again.  Things are, well, bad. 

BWAAH!

Ok...back to work. 

.

Relaxing...

Romeo is ok so far.  He is still not eating all that well, though; I am still giving him the cyproheptadine (sp) and Dr Vet gives him a shot of Valium when I take him in, but I may end up trying the pot route anyway, just to see if it works better.  Of the two drugs so far, the Valium works the best; the cyproheptadine (sp, and yes, I *am* too lazy and sleepy to look it up) seems to make him sleepier than it makes him hungry, thought that may be the Buspar.  I have no idea.  Crawford & Co. for Menu Foods did finally phone me back though, and are sending some nine pages of paperwork.  Only a month late...not too shabby.

Snort.

Harry has started a new job, and I am hoping that he can actually *keep* it for a while -- that means not having seizures 'cos he is nervous about not having seizures.  Since there is less point in giving Romeo my Valium then there is in giving it to Harry, I went ahead and gave some to Harry.

Well it not only reduces anxiety, it does serve to a small extent as an anti-seizure med; before Harry was on Keppra, he was taking it. 

Butsoanyway.

Speaking of relaxing, I have found one thing that really has helped me to fall asleep:  Designing cat furniture in my mind.

Quit laughing.

Stuff like this, or this...or even more elaborate.  I thought of a cool-ass giant tree with tree house just the other night -- like one that would reach to the ceiling, and have branches, and stuff.  For some reason, taking all my cats' different personalities and likes/dislikes into design consideration is a marvellous soporific...at least for me. 

Let's keep hoping that things go okay.

g'night