I am not responsible for my mind.

 

This morning, I started laughing hysterically in a meeting, and had trouble holding it in.  You know -- when you are red-faced and teary-eyed, gasping for breath, and dare not breathe, or else you'll fall onto the floor in that gales of giggles thing?  Well, our Head of College took the floor and started prefacing what he was going to introduce with all the things he's seen at all the different places he has been since he began his teaching career -- what awaits our almost-docs, ABDs, and post-docs.  He meant well, what with all the examples, but of course, I'm IMing Cathy (who cracks me up) and all I can think is...

 

I've seen small schools that require eating worms...I've seen research one institutions that want you to know how to chew gum and walk at the same time......and in other places, you have to strip naked and stand in front of the fireplace, balancing hot cross buns on your tuchas for HOURS!  You young whippersnappers don't know how good you have it!!'...I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. '

 

Followed then, I expect, by him whipping out something fun, like a gun.  Hee.

 

Butsoanyway.

 

Sadly, I think only HoC noticed.  Then the whole thing degenerated into a Paraguayan press conference, and everyone was laughing.  Or yelling, hard to tell.  I was in hysterics, 'cos HoC wandered off onto the topic of some administrators' help group he is in, and I swear that I heard him call it 'cock block'.  I went back into hysterics, wondering if that's a euphemism for 'dick head', or something more sinister.  I was going to ask him what the acronym was again (I have a feeling it was an acronym or abbreviation of some kind), but I was not able to speak.

 

In case you don't remember the Paraguayan press conference (...any Paraguayans here?), I'll try to post it later; it has to be on You Tube somewheres.