Monday, June 26, 2006

Ancodia who?

I know; I suck. I have meant to blog something for a few days now, and have just been too busy to finish anything I started; I usually do a post as I am typing something else, but this week has been unrelenting—I really have not had the time to do more than a few sentences before I get stuck working on something for six hours...I need sunlight. Sheesh. I had one started about a really weird dream I had, and I will get that up, maybe, eventually. Other stuff I am just sticking below:

Sunday was a bust as far as cat-catching goes. Thankfully, because it was so overcast, it worked out such that I hadn’t drugged her when it started raining like a bitch, and we gave up for the day. Damn it. So, for about an hour, it went like this:

I said, ‘Mehitabel’; she said ‘Wot?’ I said, ‘Mehitabel’; she said ‘Wot?’
I said, ‘Mehitabel’; she said ‘Wot?’ I said, ‘Mehitabel’; she said ‘Now wot you want?’

Yeah.

So I came home and was pretending to work for a little bit (I just love doing that; I am *so* easy to fool!), and then this person asked me if I wanted to do the dinner-and-movie thing, and we negotiated it down to dinner at this tiny place around the corner because I became annoyed that all my suggestions were being overlooked. I should have been hospitable and offered to make dinner, but I just didn’t feel like it, especially after all my suggestions were being ignored. Which is more my fault than anything else, because I was not, in fairness, communicating well, in that I wasn’t offering specific suggestions. I do that sometimes. But it was annoying. But I am letting it go.

On Friday, I had to write one of the nastiest emails I have ever written (and hit ‘reply all’, so that everyone received it) to a work-friend after they sent a link (as a blind-link forwarded email entitled only, ‘CHECK THIS OUT!’ which I was retarded enough to click) to some of the vilest crap I have ever read, and I consider myself to be a pretty liberal audience. This person hasn’t replied yet (though I have gotten other replies, all in agreement, including one person who thanked me for warning them not to read it, except for one person who made a really—in my opinion—misguided attempt to tell me to not censor other people…humph), and I had today off from Job II, so I guess I will hear about my email tomorrow. I’m not as revolted today as I was on Friday (and Saturday, but they were off Saturday), but I still think that I have every right to be offended; I really, honestly deeply resent this person inflicting this on me (and the other people to whom it was also forwarded), and I am still going to tell them this in person. I want it out of my head, and those ten minutes of my life back. Asshole. See? Now I am getting all fired-up again, but honest to fig newtons, after reading that shit I feel like I could drink a gallon of Listerine then jump into a pool of bleach and scrub myself with steel wool and Ajax for a week and still feel disgustingly dirty. Ugh. The moral of this is to be responsible in what you inflict on others; that’s why I would not link to it here. I mean, I am sure that I have gone overboard at times, and I probably will again, and again after that…but if it is ever something that bad, well…it was unintentional. I don’t think I have ever mentally assaulted someone like that. Grr.

I am actually going to get to sleep early tonight and try to forget about this shit. Again.

.

3 comments:

Smento said...

Now I'm all curious about the e-mail. It is therefore practically in *my* head, but it may be worse because I don't actually know what "it" is. Ancodia, how could you?

Scott Johnson said...

Yep. Morbidly curious here, too. You planned it this way ... I just know it. :)

ancodia said...

Okay; I apologise. But I promise you--we are talking about something with no merit whatsoever; no aesthetic, emotional, moral, or scientific merit at all. The only thing it might be good for (aside from its value as an emetic) is as an argument for why some people are just in need of a good killing for their own sake as well as the whole Common Welfare thing. Whomever wrote it--true or not--needs to be put away. Far, far away. Or something. I don't want to read their filth, I don't want to worry about them ending up somewhere that I or someone I care about might run into them; I resent their clogging up my Internet and probably sucking up my tax dollars because they refuse to contribute to Society in any positive way. And I know that sounds harsh, but...I am pretty sure that I mean every bit of it. And I'm reasonably certain that the author is not out curing cancer in their spare time. :-) Even if this is wholly fabricated self-indulgent wanking, it went too far.

I've known people with emotional and mental problems--many of them--and not all of them are as incapable of helping themselves in some way as others would like to pretend, even if it's only in taking their medication every day. Being obsessive-compulsive, schizophrenic (or whatever the hell is wrong with this person), etc...is not an excuse. I have also known people who have [insert problem here, including "none, whatsoever"] and just enjoy wallowing in self-pity and sickness. The author needs to unplug the god-damned computer, get a productive job, take their medication, and go build houses for the homeless if they have so fucking much free time that they can sit around and think up this sick shit. Whatever the author's issue, the person who forwarded it is almost worse for choosing to see it as a joke, or put it where it could be accessed by unsuspecting people. What if one of the recipients' children came across that? There's a responsibility there.

And I am against censorship. No, really. I am. Just, apparently (as I have recently found out), up to a point. After that point, I'm *still* against censorship. But I *am* in support of euthanasia. And I think the person who wrote this...whatever it is needs to be put down.

I'm not going to post the link because I have no control over who sees it and who doesn't if I post it, but if your curiosity is killing you, send an email and I will email the link if only to prove that I am reacting to something real and not just being a puritanical prude. But I swear to you--I am an EXCEEDINGLY liberal girl; one has to work *hard* to offend me. Just, if you read it, (1) don't blame me, and (2) if you see where it's going and don't want to go there, please stop reading and delete it; it IS going where you think (or worse), and it IS only going to get worse--it is not a joke; there is no punchline. The introduction part is not being histrionic (as I thought, having grown up on goth hyperbole); it's a warning.

I'm angry at the author, the forwarder, and...I'm fricking scarred for life. BLEAH.

And please don't pass it on.

I got into a fight (verbal) about it on Tuesday that I haven't had time to talk about. Sigh.