Tuesday, May 30, 2006

And as my will, so mote it be, you little rectangular bastard…

You sucky laptop battery, you. Charge and discharge properly—HEAR ME! Because not only am I *fully prepared* to rain all kinds of ‘Codiamagic spells down on your ass (whichever end that may be), I am about to give you up for a better model.

Yep, that’s right. *Now* you’re shaking, aren’t you? Aren’t you?

I thought so. You’d better be like, TRULY quaking in fear of my Incantation of The Infinite Listingness!

Oh, yessss…

If you don’t do what the nice people at HardwareHell (Oh, how appropriate!) say that you are going to do, I am going to sell you on eBay, and I’m going to keep you up for sale until some silly son of a bitch is dumb enough to buy you. End of sentence. I’m so sick of your shit that I might even offer free shipping. Mwa ha ha. I am Codia-Ra, Mistress of Merchantry, and I have the power of like, fuckin’ Greyskull, or whatever. And I’m gonna do it all sky-clad, too. Just you wait and see. Stupid freaking battery. I hate you.

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